Intro to the Sexual Instinct
A brief intro to the next 6 modules...
I wonder if the subject matter of the next six posts will lead to more engagement…. Not that i’m necessarily writing these for engagement, I say that more to make a point. It’s well known that the topic of Sex and Sexuality is an intriguing, excitatory, stimulating, often heavily loaded topic…even repulsive to some. If you briefly inquire into Sexuality, what comes up for you?
When addressing both Sex and Spirituality now things become even more complicated….
Sex, in it’s most basic biological function, is for procreation. We also know that certain anatomy known as erogenous zones and their neural pathways link Sex and Pleasure. So, Sex is not only for procreation, but it is also a way that we experience Pleasure. It can be complicated or simple depending on how one views it. We can also experience Pleasure without it being linked to Sex, and vice versa. I invite you to take a moment to reflect on Pleasure that has a Sexual quality vs. other ways that you experience pleasure that are non-sexual.
Earlier I mentioned the complicated relationship between Sex and Spirituality. I think it’s safe to say some of the most critical and dogmatic views on Sexuality stem from Religions and Spiritual paths. Although i’m deeply Spiritual, i’m not religious, and this topic can be a point of contention, although I don’t believe it has to be that way….
I and many others such as Freud, Jung, and Reich to name a few (not to place myself in their league - haha) have observed that a distorted, repressed, shadowy Sexual Instinct can manifest in some pretty troubling ways. With that being said, I feel strongly about the importance of consciously, intentionally, and explicitly exploring and understanding our Sexuality in a way that is free from excessive shame.
Humans are one of the few animals who participate in Sexual behavior for purposes other than procreation, those purposes being mainly for Pleasure. In the Diamond Approach we understand Pleasure to be one of the Essential Qualities. While Pleasure itself is certainly a palpable element of Sexuality, it doesn’t fully satisfy the Sexual Instinct. Once we start coupling Essential Pleasure with Essential Love, now we start to see a more complete and evolved form of the Sexual Instinct as it gets closer to harmonizing with the Enlightenment Drive.
”The Sexual Instinct has Pleasure in it. Pleasure at its root really is a good feeling that comes from goodness itself and goodness is a Spiritual quality that goes with Love. So, love and the Sexual Instinct for a human being is a way to bring in the Spiritual energy.
On a Spiritual level, sexual energy is an important expression of life force that can bring forth Union that allows Spiritual liberation, new states, different states, working with energies - sexual, erotic, love, social instinct, aliveness.”
I invite you to savor the above quote, try not to barrel past it, let it sink in.
To expand on the quote, we can discuss how Sexual energy is an energy that is embodied, experienced, and exchanged when interacting with other beings (and sometimes ourselves or different parts of ourselves).
Sexual Energy has different aspects to it. We already discussed pleasure but there are many other factors that play a role, such as…
- Initial attraction and polarity
- Choosing the “right” partners
- Putting the energy into action or movement
- Embodiment or full integration of the energy into our physical form
- Learning to master the energy consciously and intentionally
- Working with different erotogenic zones, mastering and expanding them
- Learning to circulate and build the energy
- Learning how to direct the energy
- Tantra
- Eros
- Combining sexual energy with love and elements of the Social instinct to experience Bliss and Union (with a partner, beloved, self and/or God)
- Experiencing Sexual frustration or dissatisfaction
- Sexual projection
- Object relations
- Societal and familial conditioning
- Distortion
- Trauma
- Imprinting from our initial experiences
- Power dynamics
- Aging/mortality
- Hormones and biology
- Surgeries and injuries
and more….
When the Sexual Drive is consciously and intentionally developed it becomes integrated with the Heart and with Intelligence. We choose partners who are appropriate for the expression of our truest selves. The connection, interaction, union and pleasure take on a broader quality and depth. Our consciousness becomes full, rich, vibrant and alive with full life force expression of life meeting life in a way that is liberated from history, conditioning, and distortion.
Stay tuned for the Module 7 Review; “Eros”..
With Love,
Antonia